Are You Wrrrecked?

A common complaint in the Muz household these days. ‘I’m wrrrecked’ (emphatic stress on the ‘r’ to elongate the word, thus proving just how wrrrecked you are). In Johnny’s case he is working hard during the week and getting home late most nights. Ergo, he’s wrecked. In my case, I am looking after Maggie all day, battling every lunch and dinner to get her to eat greens (persistence beats resistance, right?), helping her through teething pain, playing, singing, tickling, laughing, pushing on the swings, feeding, dressing, changing, bathing, cuddling, and finally putting her to bed when the last ounce of my energy is spent. Sometimes I have time to shower, have a coffee with friends and do some handwashing, but not often enough. Ergo….zzzzz

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Anyway I read with interest an article in last week’s Grazia about the ‘Exhaustion Epidemic’ that has hit people just like us, exhausted by physical demands of childcare or the emotional demands of living in such a fast-paced society where we are increasingly controlled by our smart phones. (The irony of reading this on my iPhone and writing about it in bed on my iPhone is not lost on me). Thankfully Gwyneth Paltrow’s doctor, Frank Lipman, has the answer. Hoorah.

Firstly he recommends you buy his book, ‘Revive: End Exhaustion And Feel Great Again’ (£8.99). But if you’re just too wrecked to go to the shop, here’s the jist of it:

1. The first one is a biggie. This involves a total overhaul of your diet so it doesn’t include any processed food or drink. I casually wonder if Farley’s rusks are considered a no-no.

2. Get outside as often as possible. Definitely second this one, particularly for WM (wrecked mummies). A quick walk once, twice, hell 5 times a day if necessary, can be a lifesaver. A walk to the baby clinic is always a good one, as you kill two birds with one walk. The pram is your new best friend.

3. Sleep in total darkness, ideally with an eye mask. An interesting one this, considering we’ve been sleeping with a night light on since Missy arrived. We are only just sleeping in darkness again after 8 months now that she’s in her own room. I think the advice is – shut off from the world as much as you can while you sleep. Hard to do this when one ear is constantly straining to hear your little duck’s breathing, while the other one enjoys the dulcet tones of your husband’s snoring.

4. Take a yoga class instead of doing an hour of cardio at the gym. Happy days, that’s one vice I wasn’t doing anyway (cardio at the gym, that is) and I’m sure my weekly amdram rehearsals are similar to a yoga class.

5. Improve your digestion by taking time to eat your meals (no grabbing a petit filous or white buttered toast with cheese on the run, then) and taking a daily probiotic and fish-oil supplements.

Easy as that. I’ve just bought cod liver oil tablets and am hoping for the best. Wish me luck!

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BooBoo Baby Lotion

Maggie’s friend Annabel always smells deeelicious…and I’ve just found out why – Booboo Baby Lotion.

The Kind & Creamy Baby lotion is non-greasy and keeps baby’s delicate skin soft and soothed but more importantly it smells divine. Makes a lovely present too.

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mini Book Review

The Stinky Cheese Man (and other fairly stupid tales) by Jon Scieszka

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It was with an air of nostalgia that I picked up this book at East Sheen library today. The last time I read it was during a children’s literature class at college. It was great being able to reread it for the sheer joy of it (and particularly enjoy the award-winning illustrations by Lane Smith) without thinking about its ‘intertextuality’, ‘unreliable narration’, ‘post-modernism’ and other metafictive devices. Saying that, it’s not as clever as I remembered. And it’s not anywhere near as funny as Roald Dahl’s ‘Revolting Rhymes’.

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The BFG (The Breast Feeding Guide)

I wouldn’t dream of beginning to tell anyone how to BF, how long to do it for, or how important or not it is. It is probably the most controversial thing you will discuss if you are a new mum (particularly in London I have found more so than in Northern Ireland), with new mums and midwives/health visitors getting very vocal about this topic in particular.

It is such a personal experience and, for some people, it just doesn’t happen for one reason or another. There’s lots of help out there if you are struggling- midwives, BF clinics, BF support groups, your NCT friends – so don’t be afraid to scream and shout! But for others it goes swimmingly and is the b(r)est, most natural thing in the world.

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Miranda Kerr breastfeeding, not me. Indeed.

If you plan to give it a go, there are some tips I can share to get you started at least.

1. Nursing Bras

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Buy a couple of nursing bras – you will live in them, and very possibly sleep in them (I did!) so you’ll need a couple at least: maybe 2 x dark and 2 x white or nude to go with your wardrobe. M&S have a bra fitting service which is handy, so go along to get measured up a few weeks before you are due.

2. Breast Pads

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Buy Breast Pads before bambino arrives. I would recommend Lansinoh – I bought their Disposable Nursing Pads and they were great as they have double sticky pads and are very absorbent. They’re also pretty cheap. My friend Orla highly recommended Tommee Tippee ones but I never tried them. I did try the cheaper own label ones but they were pants and kept falling out of my bra. LilyPadz are new ‘invisible’ pads which are great for a night out with no lumps and bumps showing.
Start with one pack and go from there.

3. Nursing chair

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Some mums swear by a nursing cushion or chair to ease pressure on their backs when they are feeding. I’m not sure, I did use a cushion for my bump when I got very big towards the end of my pregnancy and it helped me sleep, but I could never get the knack of using it as a BF cushion. I did buy a gorgeous nursing chair from Fergus at The Pine Box in Coalisland and I use it now to read Maggie a story at night. It also looks very pretty in her room (which is the most important thing, right?)

4. Maternity tops

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When you are BF your wardrobe becomes pretty limited. If like me you spent the last 8 weeks of pregnancy wearing more or less the same thing because nothing else fitted, you’ll be dying to get into something new and fresh. There are special nursing tops you can buy but I did loads of online searches and found them all quite hideous. Best to get normal tops in a bigger size that you can easily pull down so as not to reveal your belly and boobs. Or if you are brave, get pretty ones that are loose at the bottom that you can lift up and have a nursing vest top underneath.

5. Capes ‘n Covers

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If you are BF in public, you might need more than a little Muslin square to cover you. Quite a few of my friends wore capes to cover themselves in public – Bebe au lait seem to be most popular – but others got away with a cleverly placed pashmina or an Abel & Anais muslin. The key is not to panic and get yourself all flustered when it happens (as I did!) You’ll only end up drawing attention to yourself AND exposing yourself, when really no one would have noticed otherwise.

6. Breast Pump

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In my electric v manual breast pump strawpoll on Facebook, my mummies voted 90% electric. I would recommend the Medela mini electric breast pump, even though I never used it. I was lucky to get a loan of an Avent double pump from my friend Anita, which was very fortunate indeed. But it wasn’t portable and a bit fiddly so expressing always felt like a big deal. My sister had the Medela one and it just looked so much handier; I mean, she could load a washing while expressing- how cool was that. This display of multitasking was beaten only by my friend Sam who regularly breastfed on one boob, pumped on the other and did a spot of online shopping on the iPhone with her free hand.

My issue with expressing was that I fairly soon had one under-performing and one over-performing boob (the Dud and the Megaboob I liked to call them). So for quite some time I was getting very little milk from The Dud, and expressing constantly to try to ‘stimulate’ the bugger. It was very frustrating to say the least.

One good piece of advice I was given, however, was to wait until you know you can BF before you invest £70+ in a pump. Some mummies just don’t produce enough milk to express, so ideally borrow one if you can.

7. In Case of Emergency

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Even though you are BF, have some baby formula in the cupboard. You might never have to use it, but it is very reassuring to know that it is there if you aren’t producing enough milk/just can’t do it/are knackered/ get mastitis etc and – this is important – it’s not poison! If you have to use it, it’s fine, don’t allow any midwife or health visitor or well-meaning yummy mummy tell you any different. I was terrified to start using formula, but was then reminded that my friend’s little baby was fed formula milk for the first days of his life because he was premature and in neonatal AND IT WAS FINE. I also found out that I was never ever breastfed, not even for a day. Apparently it wasn’t advised as formula was all the rage back then. And I’m FINE (mostly).

Aptimel and SMA seem to be the most popular, but there are lots of others – some friends use HiPP Organic, and there’s always the old favourite Cow & Gate.

8. Drinking from a bottle

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Even if you never use formula, it is a brilliant idea to get your little duck used to drinking expressed breast milk from a bottle. Honestly, it is so important to encourage this early so that at some stage in the near future you can leave your little one in the capable hands of your partner, mum, sister, neighbour while you go to the hairdressers, the gym, amdram rehearsals, or just get out of the house. Again there are lots of brands of bottles out there. You might try out a few different ones and it’ll really be a personal preference. I was always told that Dr Brown bottles reduced wind but I wasn’t a big fan of the long teat- it just didn’t seem very boob-like (you imagine that something as close to the boob as possible is best). I also tried Avent bottles as they came free with the steriliser, but didn’t really like them.

In the end I went for Tommee Toppee as it was recommended on a lot of websites and won lots of awards & have used them since. You’ll need No. 1 teats for the first few months and then can upgrade to no. 2 and no. 3 as they grow up and need a faster flow. I mistakenly missed out on no. 3s for a while and poor Maggie was sucking the life out of the bottle and taking ages to feed.

9. Steriliser

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You will need a steriliser for bottles, teats, breast pump utensils, dummies. I bought a Philips Avent microwave steriliser – they’re currently half price on amazon I’ve noticed – and it was great. You can fit 6 Avent bottles in there or 4/5 Tommee Tippee ones, which is plenty.
link to website here
I did end up buying a larger plug-in digital steam steriliser as we were going on a road trip to France and I was worried that we wouldn’t find microwaves on the way. I shouldn’t have, there was one at every motorway service station and on the boat, and the digital steriliser was just bigger, bulkier and held one additional bottle. Not worth the £50.

10. Weaning baby

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When you decide to stop BF and are weaning off, you’ll find that your boobs get really big and heavy (and sore. Oh so sore). And of course you’re not meant to express the excess milk as it defeats the purpose.

So, a funny story to end – as I was weaning my Megaboob off around 3 months (The Dud was practically empty anyway) it got particularly big and sore and Full. So full in fact that it was rock hard. I swear to God I thought it was going to explode. I happened to be in Hammersmith at the time doing a spot of shopping, so I raced to the car park as I desperately needed to get home to express. I put Maggie in her carseat and was about to start the engine, but honestly the Megaboob was seriously sore and getting bigger and bigger. Could it explode? Hell, I didn’t know, but it was looking likely. So, after a cursory look around and seeing no one coming, I wound down the window, took the boob out, stuck it out the window and just pressed on it. Whooooooosh! The relief was palpable. Of course I’ve since thought about the security cameras which might have picked up an image the security men will never forget. You know, I always said I’d never tell that story, but there it is. If you didn’t laugh…

So, Good luck! And do get in touch if you want any non-judgmental advice.
Some official helpline numbers below

National Breastfeeding Helpline 0300 100 0212
NCT Breastfeeding Line 0300 330 0771
La Leche League 0845 120 2918
The Breastfeeding Network 0300 100 0210
The Association of Breastfeeding Mothers 08444 122 949

Barnes Olympic Cinema drinks evening

Last Thursday night 9 Feb John & I headed to a drinks evening at the new Olympic cinema in Barnes.

Billed as a ‘hard hat’ event, I was a tad nervous about having to wear a hat and dirty old hi-vis jacket over my leopard print coat but thankfully that wasn’t the case! Mairead had done an incredible job making the building look inspiring inside, despite it still being very much a building site.

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The evening was for Founder Members and was to celebrate planning permission being granted to turn the Olympic back into the cinema it once was. In the intervening years it has been a theatre and latterly the great Olympic Recording Studios where, since the 1960s, bands from The Rolling Stones and Jimi Hendrix to Madonna and Oasis have recorded. U2 were the last band to record at the Olympic with ‘No Line on the Horizon’ in December 2008.

We had a great night mingling with the Barnes locals including Alistair McGowan and enjoying drinks and nibbles including Jameson Irish mule cocktails, Appletiser, mini hot dogs and mini ice cream cones.

The Olympic Cinema is due to open this summer, boutique in style, but with plans to show mainstream films on general release as well as showing art house and children’s movies at the weekend. There’s also talk of a members club and cocktail bar. I’m so excited to have somewhere like this in sleepy Barnes, and secretly hope that Cameron Mackintosh will decide to premiere the Les Misérables film at the Olympic in 2013!

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3 for 2 baby event in Boots

There’s a 3 for 2 Mix & Match across selected baby products in Boots at the moment! Stock up on those baby essentials now

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Top 10 things new mummies can’t do without

1. Muslin Squares

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Everyone says it, and everyone is right. You will need them for everything from mopping up milk on your little one, to mopping up boke on you; from emergency changing mats when you forget yours to emergency bibs; from sunshades to playmats; they can (just about) cover your boob if you are caught out & need to breastfeed in public and can be used as an alternative to cotton wool to top and tail your little one. I have always used one as a comfort blanket as they are so light and breathable and Maggie still uses them now. They are, in a word, indispensable. Just make sure you get enough of them! You can get them everywhere: Boots, Asda, Mothercare, Amazon – the cheapest I found were at Tesco for less than £1 each – but there are prettier ones too. These ones are from www.toysrus.co.uk £6.99 for 4

2. An iPhone

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Or similar. Apart from the obvious benefit of taking great quality photos and videos of your little munchkin, it also becomes an essential lifeline for the new mum (well, me anyway). It saw me through those early, sleepless nights in so many ways..online sudoku games, online shopping for newborn essentials, being able to read a book or magazine with just the nightlight and your iPhone, all while your little one doesn’t sleep or tries to sleep. Once the fog of those first weeks have lifted, it is great to be able to share photos, update your Facebook and Twitter friends, email your new NCT mums to arrange coffee mornings, book your trial class at Gymboree, write a blog (!), without it feeling like too much of a chore.

(Of course, as your little one grows it will become his or her Favourite Thing too, but that’s for another day and another post). If you don’t own a Smartphone now, you should! Believe me you’ll never look back.

3. Lansinoh nipple cream

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Nipple cream is essential. This one was recommended to me by lots of mums. Thankfully I didn’t get it too bad myself and only used about 1/4 tube throughout the whole BF episode, but I know some mummies who had to lather it on constantly & went through quite a few tubes! Just buy one to start with and see how you go.

4. Aden & Anais Muslin Swaddling Blanket /Muslin Squares

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Brilliant for all the reasons listed above as they are basically very large muslin squares, but a friend told me that they would be the most useful present I received and she was right! Especially for summer babies, these are so soft and light they make perfect swaddling blankets to keep babies warm without overheating (all new mummies freak out about this, right?) Apparently a big hit in the US amongst celebrities like Gwen Stefani and Julia Roberts, they are becoming a big hit here too. I got mine from my friend Anna from www.amazon.co.uk

5. Ariel Whitening Powder

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You will get a lot of what my sister and I call ‘up the backers’, where literally your little dote has pooed and it has gone up and out the back of the nappy. Could equally be called ‘out the siders’ for the same reason. When this happens his or her little vest tends to be full of the stuff, so you need to steep it straight away in this. This miracle powder was recommended by my sister-in-law mum of 3 after a particularly nasty up-the-back incident which threatened to ruin forever Maggie’s new, white, designer sleepsuit (a gift, of course). But no, steeped in this (you can add it to your main wash too), the stain disappeared like magic. Miracle stuff I tell you.

6. Geraldine the Giraffe

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It doesn’t have to be Geraldine herself, of course, but very early on Maggie adopted her favourite toy, and the two of them are best friends still. Geraldine is great because she has black and white crackly feet (baby’s favourite colours apparently) and lots of rings which she had used to reach for, grab onto and chew on as she has grown. Now the pair of them just chew the fat and have a good old yarn.

7. A Rocking Chair

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A great place for your little one to chill out, go for a snooze, mooch in, play in, sit in while you have a sneaky shower or pee (!) and later reach for and play the mobiles attached to it. One friend took hers everywhere as their little one loved it so; another swore that the chair on vibration was the only thing that chilled hers out when he was little.

They do grow out of them quite quickly so try to borrow one from a friend if you can. Our friend Susan lent us hers which was a huge help as you only need it for about 6 months.

8. A Bucket Bath

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I was very confused about baby baths when I was pregnant with Missy. The books didn’t help – the advice seemed to swing from a baby plastic bath to no bath at all (one suggested taking a bath with your darling one every time they needed it. I did try it – but it’s hard enough getting your little one out and dried and powdered and nappied and creamed without doing the whole thing stark naked!) So I called upon my Facebook mummies and the resounding consensus for those first few months was a bucket bath. I don’t think this is the actual name but it’s what my mum called it when she first saw it: ‘What? You’re going to bath Maggie in a BUCKET!?’ (I’ve just googled it, it’s called a Tummy Tub). Not only do they look very cute in them, it really helps bring up wind and they get to sit up in lovely warm water almost unaided from such an early age. It helps make bathing a very relaxing and enjoyable experience for everyone.

9. Cloud B Sleep Sheep

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A strange one to recommend on my Top 10, as I didn’t actually buy one! But I was very lucky as Maggie was a good sleeper from the start. For those of my friends whose little ducks didn’t sleep so contentedly, many of them swore by the Sleep Sheep. They rated them up there with other ‘white noise’ devices like the Hoover and the hairdryer to help settle their little ones.

10. A Baby First Aid Kit

Along with general First Aid Kit essentials, this collection should include :

For every ailment- Calpol
To check baby’s temperature- a good quality digital thermometer. Many people (me included) have the Braun Digital Ear Thermometer
For colds/blocked noses- saline spray, decongestant rub & a plug-in vapouriser
For ezcema- every baby is different so you’ll end up trying everything! I have found Cetraben Emollient cream or Epaderm is best for everyday moisturising and Hydrocortisone cream (sporadically) for bad patches.
My friend’s mum swears by a herbal remedy Chickweed, but I’ve not tried it, so ask your health visitor and health shop to advise you.
For teething- Teething gel & powders. I found the powders worked better (Nelsons) but used both for bad cases
For nappy rash- typically linked to teething, sometimes you need Canesten if normal nappy cream isn’t clearing it.

Until you get to know your own little bundle & what particular things might ail them you’ll just need Calpol. And cuddles.

Welcome to my blog

I am thrilled that eight of my good friends are pregnant & due to have little bambini in 2012. So, before my mushy brain forgets everything that the last 8 months have taught me, I have decided to share some of the advice and funny stories that helped me get through those first, mad, wonderful, crazy, incredible few months with my little duck. And of course we are still learning on the job so I hope all you mummies out there will continue to share your advice and entertain us with your witty banter.

So, to my scrummy mummies & mummies-to-be, this blog is for you. Enjoy!

Love Me & Maggie aka Missy, Duck, baby bean (8 1/4months)

Follow on Twitter @BabyLovesBlog

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